In a dream, two different childhood classmates showed up, along with a man who looked very much like Lemmy Kilmister, the late lead singer of Motörhead. Also, my subconscious invented a weird, inefficient elevator. Pleased and curious, I mulled it over, researched and consulted my Higher Self. The results are explored in the following post. Wanna come with?
This dream took place on December 27, 2020:
I was a patron at a dimly lit bar with wooden walls and wooden flooring that probably creaked under our feet if I could have heard it, but there were a number of us in a small space with music turned up, and I was focused on the fact that I recognized a couple of staff members; this was intriguing enough that upon waking, I wrote down everything from the dream that I could. Lately, there have been some dreams I've let slide after researching, sticking my notes in the recycling bin and allowing the memories to fade from mind because they were not only very brief, but mundane, sometimes too similar to previous messages from my subconscious, and most certainly not interesting enough to post for you, reader.
This dream, though...this one had something for us to mull over together. Now back to the bar staff:
I hardly knew Jesse. We were classmates for a while in middle school and barely spoke, maybe due to just being quite different, so my impression of him had a weak foundation in the sense that it was based on assumption and not experience. When analyzing the dream later, I assumed that Jesse was there to represent maturity and creativity; he seemed to have real passion and talent in the arts and I once overheard him saying that he hoped to graduate early from high school to help move things along in his career pursuits. I translated his behavior as calmly accepting of one's self and of their sexual orientation, which are not traits one should necessarily expect from someone that young.
I knew that Wyatt worked there but I never saw him, a decision made by my subconscious. He showed up because, according to my Higher Self, he represented "Mr. Cool", so to speak, explained to me through Tarot by the King of Cups because back in fourth grade, he seemed amusing and personable, and I never saw him nervous, unsure of how to act, an interpretation I made because I dwelled in both of those things.
Instead, I saw a curly-haired, thin white kid whom I first saw working on something on or attached to the ceiling of someone else's Jeep in the parking lot. The kid was named Brandon and I decided quickly that he was some kind untrustworthy.
Soon, it was party time, the room was full and a man arrived whose style was directly, unabashedly based on that of Lemmy Kilmister with long dark hair, black clothing, and specifically shaped dark facial hair that I didn't inspect. This skinny, grizzled character got drunk and had a good time until suddenly something took him down - I mean, really, he fell hard - mere feet behind me, while my dream self stood still and simply watched. Shortly thereafter, he died and I helped Brandon and two other staffers get rid of the body. It wasn't hard to conclude that these scenes represented negative beliefs or a negative personality trait "being overcome by positive influences", as Dream Bible put it.
This bar was in a three-story building, and at one point, I ended up standing in a different section, one that had an elevator close to the front door, and the buttons for the floors were not only installed inside the elevator, as per usual, but on a rectangular piece of metal just 6-10 feet away, further inside the building. I assigned myself the task of standing at those buttons, pushing them for people at their request. This happened multiple times, even when two young women got into the elevator in party dresses, one of which was very sparkly, and I noticed that one of the girls was white with blonde hair, the other Asian with dark hair. They needed to get to the third floor, and I made the mistake of pushing the middle button, which I leaned closer and squinted at after the elevator doors had closed. The button read "2.5".
Per the dream site, "To dream of an elevator represents feelings about how easily it is to control how good or bad a situation experienced will be. Effortless choices...how easy it is to increase or decrease the seriousness of a situation", and as we've discussed before, the inclusion of the Asian woman represents a belief or a personality trait of mine that I consider to be less common, perhaps less popular in the world around me.
Another scene had me outside the bar one night, passing a long metal fence on my left when the neighbor dog barked in a way that I interpreted as reminiscent of the "no no no no no no-no-no-no" in the Human Beinz song Nobody But Me, so I sang part of it to the furry buddy just as two patrons who appeared to be old enough to be Baby Boomers left the bar, one of whom teased me, saying something like, "How do you know that song?"
The dog's owner came out and put the animal (I think a golden retriever?) on a leash and invited me to come over for a silly little performance. A tall mirror appeared beside them and they were about to do something with Michael Jackson's Man in the Mirror.
The impression I had of Motörhead's Lemmy involved excess excess excess, related myopic impulsiveness and maybe lacking the family-oriented or spiritual or conformist values and choices that are common in my social circles. If I'd known him personally, I would not have tried to change the man in any way, mind you, but it's quite obvious how different he and I were. When the f**k would you have ever seen an op-ed from him in a magazine about chakras or talking to dead people? Could you picture him wearing a shirt onstage with a slogan about the collective consciousness? I think not!
Anyway, he put out the image of living the quintessential rock star lifestyle and I'm confident that a look-alike showed up in my dream to represent immature behavior within myself that was figuratively killed off, and same with brash, poorly thought-out moments since I started allowing my assertiveness to properly awaken. After all, it's been an adjustment.
I'm proud of the effort I've put in thus far, becoming more accepting and loving of myself, overcoming painful weight that held me back. Considering the positive things that my subconscious brain associates with Jesse and Wyatt, those two classmates I had years ago, the fact that they helped me bury the dead body of some unhealthy behaviors is a great sign! And what an entertaining way to exemplify that! Though this was followed by imagery that could represent my newfound confidence (singing in the yard) and the protection (dog) and assessment (mirror) of that confidence.
This whole thing was telling a short, concise story, updating me on something my subconscious was and may still be playing with, but frankly, that's growth. These days, I get to indulge my intellectual curiosity with stuff I never expected, stuff that can, at turns, be exciting or lovely or humbling or an emotional and mental challenge. I question beliefs, morals and ethics as part of a greater effort to become more compassionate. This overhaul on myself is far from finished and I hope to keep it up, to devote energy for the rest of my life to challenging my own entrenched thinking, as well as play and pleasure.
No comments:
Post a Comment