Kill, Marry, Bang: 'It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia' Edition

Marry: I would want to get hitched to Mac! Could I still do that? Imagine the weird, weird ceremony with Mac in a leather jacket, Charlie as a groomsman and Dennis secretly acting as best man, which would make for a bachelor party that would last for two or three days and be all kinds of illegal. Mac would show up at the venue for our wedding, brushing dust from his jeans, playing with a cowlick, saying, “Don’t ask…Do you have any food?”

Bang: The attorney. Did you know that the Always Sunny gang has one? They meet with him when they have issues with employment contracts and patents and they have tied his assistant to the bathroom sink.

 I find him very attractive. I could set aside my fear of childbirth and have his kid. Either Charlie or Dennis could track him down during an emergency, hoping he’d save them from something, only to find that their lawyer would be busy in the maternity ward of a local hospital, awaiting the birth of his equally judgmental and good-looking baby.

 

Kill: Dennis, for damn sure. He’s known for being funny simply because of his vanity and sociopathy. Oh, and his wonderfully pathetic, codependent relationship with Mac – that’s funny too.